A 95-year-old man and his 94-year-old wife go to a lawyer to get a divorce.
The lawyer asks, “When did you get married?”
“I was 19,” the man says.
“So you’ve been married over 75 years?” the lawyer asks.
“Yes,” says the wife. “Seventy-five miserable years.”
“When did the marriage start going wrong?” the lawyer asks.
“Almost immediately,” the man replies. “After two years, I couldn’t stand her. Every year since has been worse.”
“Oh please,” the woman snaps. “I made it three years. After that, living with him was unbearable. Awful habits. Treated me terribly.”
The lawyer pauses. “I can help you divorce—but if you’ve been unhappy this long, why wait until now?”
The wife answers calmly:
“We were waiting for the kids to die.”
