{"id":8115,"date":"2025-10-07T18:45:56","date_gmt":"2025-10-07T18:45:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/?p=8115"},"modified":"2025-10-07T18:45:56","modified_gmt":"2025-10-07T18:45:56","slug":"for-his-birthday-david-got-a-parrot-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/?p=8115","title":{"rendered":"For his birthday, David got a parrot"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"57\" data-end=\"347\">This wasn\u2019t your typical sweet-talking parrot. Oh no. This bird was full-grown, foul-mouthed, and ruder than a sailor on bad coffee. David tried kindness, soft music, even classical radio\u2014nothing worked. Be polite, it swore. Yell, it screamed louder. It was basically a feathery gangster.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"349\" data-end=\"580\">One day, at his wit\u2019s end, David shoved the parrot in the freezer for a few seconds. Chaos ensued\u2014squawks, scratches, frozen feathers\u2014but then\u2026 silence. He opened the door. The parrot stepped out, frost-tipped feathers, and said:<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"582\" data-end=\"672\">\u201cSir, I apologize for my behavior. I\u2019ll be a model bird from now on. Please forgive me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"674\" data-end=\"770\">David blinked. The parrot leaned closer and whispered: \u201c\u2026So\u2026 what exactly did the chicken do?\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; This wasn\u2019t your typical sweet-talking parrot. Oh no. This bird was full-grown, foul-mouthed, and ruder than a sailor on bad coffee. David tried kindness, soft music, even classical radio\u2014nothing worked. Be polite, it swore. Yell, it screamed louder. It was basically a feathery gangster. One day, at his wit\u2019s end, David shoved the parrot &hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":8116,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8115","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8115","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8115"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8115\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8117,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8115\/revisions\/8117"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/8116"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8115"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=8115"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=8115"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}