{"id":12808,"date":"2026-02-02T12:58:52","date_gmt":"2026-02-02T12:58:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/?p=12808"},"modified":"2026-02-02T12:58:52","modified_gmt":"2026-02-02T12:58:52","slug":"an-exhausted-looking-blonde","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/?p=12808","title":{"rendered":"An exhausted-looking blonde"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"178\" data-end=\"443\">An exhausted blonde visits her doctor, complaining that barking dogs keep her awake all night. The doctor gives her powerful sleeping pills\u2014but weeks later she\u2019s even more tired. Why? She\u2019s been up all night chasing dogs and trying to make them swallow the pills.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"445\" data-end=\"636\">A blonde carrying a baby asks to use a drugstore\u2019s baby scale. When the clerk suggests weighing the baby by subtracting the mother\u2019s weight, she refuses\u2014because she\u2019s the aunt, not the mom.<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"638\" data-end=\"893\">A blonde goes rollerblading with headphones on and asks for a haircut without removing them. One stylist refuses, another agrees. When the stylist removes the headphones to wake her, she collapses. The headphones were playing: \u201cBreathe in, breathe out.\u201d<\/p>\n<p data-start=\"895\" data-end=\"1139\">In a futuristic society, knowledge comes in pill form. A student easily swallows pills for literature, biology, and history\u2014but when asking for math, the pharmacist brings out a massive pill. Why? Because math has always been hard to swallow.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; An exhausted blonde visits her doctor, complaining that barking dogs keep her awake all night. The doctor gives her powerful sleeping pills\u2014but weeks later she\u2019s even more tired. Why? She\u2019s been up all night chasing dogs and trying to make them swallow the pills. A blonde carrying a baby asks to use a drugstore\u2019s &hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":12809,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12808","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12808","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=12808"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12808\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12810,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12808\/revisions\/12810"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/12809"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=12808"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=12808"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifevibesever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=12808"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}